MTA wants me to become a walking advertisement for screwing for the poor.
Despite "finding" $222 million in their coffers recently, The merrily mismanaged MTA says it still needs to raise fares 4% for a majority of straphangers early next year (somebody's got to pay for their useless terror robots).
To commemorate this joyous occasion, area jewelry retailer Michael Fina now offers mini MetroCard cufflinks for $135 (15 bucks less than the Bleacher Creature ones!).
Yeah, they're exactly what I want to slip through the holes of my one snooty French cuff dress shirt when I hit the town this holiday season—cutesy reminders of the drudgery of my fucking migraine-inducing 360-block daily commute to and from work on your laughably inept subway system.
Since you over-compensated pricks are certainly getting part of the proceeds from the sale of these stupid accouterments, how 'bout including a 30-day unlimited ride card with purchase? Remember: I'm already working security for you lazy clowns.